Graduation

Alright, bawl me out again, I'm used to it. Yes I know it's been a long time since I last wrote in my blog, and I know that you have been waiting anxiously to read a new entry. And since one major event in my life happened......8 days ago, I might as well tell you about it.
OK, so graduation is suppose to be a fairly serious event, I mean, you only graduate once in your life, right? However, I hate formal events. I mean, I feel so stuffed and fake, I just hate it. So as you probably read in my last blog entry, I decided to wear a duct tape tux, thanks to the creativity of my sister Rachel. Red and blue with Habs logo's gracing the suit, it made a huge impact in the ceremonies, or so I am told.
The first part of grad is when we are in our toga's or gowns or whatever you want to call them Now I was originally going to go up their with no pants to keep myself cool, but I would have my undergarments on for sure. Anywho, I was talked into putting on jeans for this parts of the ceremonies, and it was fair enough. The fan behind me was going at a good clip, but the gowns were thick and I couldn't feel the breeze anyway. Anyway, the tassel on my hat kept going venturing into my mouth, and I'd gag and spit out the strings constantly. I was called up eventually to get my diploma, and then they also decided to throw in the "Best All Around Award", which surprised me incredibly. I mean, I got a weird look on my face, or so I am told. After the boring part of the ceremonies were nearly over, I began to wonder how in the world I was going to get up the stairs in my pants, and get the pants on period. Just before we got off stage we were suppose to throw our hats in the air, as is custom around here (and most other places). Ya, well, to be different I threw mine straight ahead, as my family sat 4 rows in front of me. The hat didn't make it and hit someone in the face. I quickly ducked my head and got off the stage as fast as possible (but with my luck, I was the last one off).
We quickly ran off to the school library to change and get our escorts ready for the Grand March. I ran off to the staff bathroom and somehow got on my very, very tight pants and vest. I ran (OK, I walked as fast as I could as it's impossible to run in those pants) back to the library, and got help getting on my jacket. I quickly got beside my escort, who was my cousin Charlotte, and stood uncomfortably in the lineup. As we proceeded forward, I felt the butterflies in my stomach begin to punch and scream to let them out. No way was I puking during the ceremonies I said, and I then punched my gut to let those creatures know who was in charge.
We came out of the arch around the middle of the pack, and started walking towards the middle of the gym. I heard alot of excited whispers like "What is that guy wearing?" and "I'd hate to be his escort". However, I kept a straight, grim look on my face and sorta glared at the people you were pointing and talking about me and my cousin. We were stopped numerous times for pictures, much to our dismay, because I was sweating to death underneath the suit. We circled the gym twice, and on the second go round I was stopped again, but not for a picture. Some Senators fan had the gall to begin beaking me! Just because I love the Habs and have a duct tape suit doesn't mean I'm a weird person, does it? He began yelling about how the Sens, who were down 2-0 in the series at that point, were so much better than any other team and how they were going to win the cup. Well, I hate cocky, over-the-top fans. I mean, this guy must be hardcore hockey, and that's just not cool. I would have decked him save the fact I couldn't even hug anybody when I had the jacket on and he was about a foot taller and 50 pounds heavier. But whats size when you have guts? My escort pulled me away and we got back on track, walking to the left side of the gym, getting myself ready to go back on stage.
Now another dilemma arose. I couldn't walk up stairs. Yes, this is a problem because even if I did manage to get up stage, it would look very awkward and just plain old wrong. I began to sweat and I couldn't tell if it was the spotlight I was standing in front of or the fact that I was about to make a complete fool of myself. I then decided, with some encouragement from my friends Kelcie and Tamara, to rip open my vest and walk up the stairs backwards. I don't know the reason why, but I could walk up stairs backwards in these pants. All of a sudden the time came, and I stepped forward......
First of all I had to drop off my escort at her seat. I couldn't hug people, as I may or may not have entered earlier, so when she sat down I "pounded" her fist. For those less hip that is when two people punch fists, a sign of thanks. Anyways, I went up to the stairs, whirled around and ripped open my vest. I began dancing up the stairs backwards, my hands in the shape of guns as I pretended to shoot at the crowd. I nearly tripped as I missed the second last step, but I got on stage safely.
I then got help in ripping off my jacket (too hot), and then I sat down in my seat by the fan. I felt bad for the people in front of me for two reasons. One, I was hogging the fan, and two, the sweaty smell that came form my being was being pushed at them by the fan.
After the Grand March it was rather boring, me just sitting in my seat listening to people talk. After the ceremonies I talked to some people, with all of them asking about my suit. Seemed to me that they could care less about me, they just wanted to talk about how I got the suit mad, if there was material underneath, if it was hot (like that wasn't evident!). I then went outside and stripped off my pants in the street (this is true, just like the rest of my story), then drove home. Once I got home, I had my third shower of the day, and then made a fire and partied with my friends and family all night long. I was so hopped up on Pepsi I couldn't think straight, and I suppose it didn't help that I drank some 5 hour energy stuff I had found at a drugstore ( I wonder why there was a warning on it for people under the age of 18?). Anyway, I stayed up till about 5:00 AM with my cousin Joe before I crashed. And thus concludes today story, tune in next time when I try to remember another painful childhood memory.

Countdown to grad

Well, graduation is almost here and I suppose that normal people are supposed to be getting nervous. However, I am not normal, therefore I am not nervous. I will get nervous about three hours before the ceremonies, and once I get on stage I will be perfectly fine. However, I should describe some of my graduation preparations with you.
My suit, oh man, it is the bomb. That is a good thing for you old, un-hip people. Anyway, it is made up of.......duct tape. No lies, my sister is a genius. Of course the suit was my idea, but she designed it and created it. Amazing, eh? Ya, and it is red and blue. Deadly, huh?
It is hard to walk around in, however, and is extremely hot. I just might die on stage. Either way I am sure to make news headlines in Debden and the local communities.
After grad I suppose I will come home, sit up all night drinking pop and eating s'mores, and then sleeping for a few hours. Then its off to some of my classmates barbeque's, and back home. Sleep some more, go to church, and then my barbecue begins. Yes, it is sure to be a nutty weekend. I shall tell more once the ceremonies are done, if I survive that is.

Impossible Problems

I have a problem. It isn't one of these do-or-die problems, but it still is a "pesky" question. I know, I hate those things too, that's why I call it a pesky problem.
Now this problem has harassed me for a long while, stupid thing. My problem is....I am unsure of myself.
"Wow," I hear you say, "I know what he means dude. I hate that too." Yes sir, or yes'm depending on your gender, I feel for you. It truly is agonizing, a pain in your mind. But is your problem the same as mine?
I am unsure about many things. I don't know how I will like life after school is over. Will I love the freedom I will be given, or will I merely turn into a wreck?
Will I be too busy in the summer and have to cut back on my workload?
Will I miss my friends when I am gone, or will I replace them and forget about them?
Do I like someone as a friend or as something more?
Will someone sign into MSN in the next minute?
You see, these are just some examples of my "pesky" problems. I need to become clear-headed, but it isn't like I can just go out and buy a wisdom pill. Wouldn't that be neat though? Anyway, I can pray, which I do anyway, and despite you may think I believe it works. But some of these things have been bugging me for a long time and they are frankly angering me. I will deal with them no doubt, and maybe I should ask others what they think I should do. But I think I will go and try to sort out some of these problems now.

Fear tastes like hair

Well, I did it. No, I didn't rob a bank or get a girlfriend, nothing that extreme. I did, however, ride a horse.
OK, big deal, right? I know what you are thinking, "Everyone has ridden a horse, and now this knucklehead is writing about it being so amazing and stuff. I should quit reading this crap." Well, don't stop reading this blog, otherwise I'll hunt you down and....and.....well, hunt you down.
Anywho, back to this horse thing. I actually have ridden one before, but it was so long ago I can barely remember it. However, I must confess something: I am afraid of horses.
Yes, the impenetrable Jeremy Loseth is afraid of something. Ohhh, lets harass him now, maybe it will make us feel better. Ya, right, just remember what goes around comes around.
Right, where was I before you distracted me? Oh ya, the riding experience. Well, a good friend of mine got a horse, and she wanted me to ride it. Now I had dug myself this grave a long time ago, like a year or so. I promised to ride her future horse, as I didn't really think that she would get one while I was still at home. So I agreed, secretly smirking to myself because I thought I had just outsmarted her. Man was I ever wrong.
Well, it was Sunday and again she had been complaining about her father not giving in to her whining and begging for a horse. However, mere hours after this, she comes to the Esso and tells me that she got a horse. Well, I was gobsmacked. I smiled weakly and told her I was happy, my heart in my lower intestine as I knew the comment that would follow. Looking straight at me, Linsay smiled and said "Now you have to come and ride him."
I agreed and went home. Now I was flustered. Why, why did this happen to me? Why couldn't her dad wait 4 more months? If he wasn't such a tough guy, and my friends dad, I probably would have done....nothing.
Now I managed to put it off for a little while despite her and her friends harassing me. I had to work some nights and hunt others. But then came Thursday, and I had no excuse. I agreed to go over with my brother and ride it.
Well, the horse wasn't quite as big or as stinky as I imagined it was going to be. Needless to say, I was still scared, but felt a wee bit better. Linsay started to get the saddle and stuff ready as me and my brother were put to work brushing off the horse. However, the wind picked up and me and Derek offered to humbly leave and ride another day. Like that was going to work.
Well, she promptly took off the blanket and told me to get on. I must have looked absolutely horrified because she stifled a laugh and told me again. After some prodding, I got on and she led me around, trying to discreetly throw me off balance so I could be laughed at. Unfortunately for her, I have cat-like reflexes and stayed on. Derek got on and nearly cried, but survived the short walk.
Anyways, as I sit at home I have a urge to go back there and ride the horse again, this time with a saddle. It was actually kinda fun, and I am slowly getting hooked. I bet by the time summer is over I will be completely hooked, and then I will have a horrific withdrawal period at Nipawin.
Anywho, I faced my fear this week, and it felt good. Maybe you should do the same.

Blue Mountain

Do you know how I'd love to spend my days off? Paintballing. Now I can't say that I'm a pro paintballer as I have gone a mere two times, both to the same place. And where did I go paintballing? Read the title and you'll find out.
Blue Mountain is more than a paintball course, it is an amusement center. There is wall climbing, zip lines and a whole lot more. It is really alot of fun. Anyway, I didn't do too much but paintball anyway, so I guess I'll be forced to tell you those stories.
The first time was rather boring, not enough people were there to make it interesting. But the second time I went, which was with the Shell Lake School classes 7/8/9, I had the best time of my life.
The first round was slow, a capture the flag type of game. The course was small and frantic, and I prefer the bigger places so I can run around and have more room to shoot. I got my wish on the second round.
The second round took place in a very large place. There was two foxholes where about 3 people could hide, and the main trench had room for about 6 or 7 people. The trenches overlooked a small bush that went around to the right of the trenches, and the left was another bushy area. The center was littered with things to hide behind, like a fridge and barrels. Anyways, I started up top and went into the far right trench overlooking the bushy area. I wasn't there alone of course, I had three other guys with me; Andrew, Morgan and Jesse. Now we couldn't really fit in there so well, so we kinda laid as flat as we could around it when there was no action.
A couple of minutes into the game I saw 2 people walking into the bush at the bottom of the hill. We opened fire but the range was too great and it was hard for us to hit them, but we bravely shot on. I could see the other trenches being peppered and occasionally the assailants would open up at us, but we held our ground well. When we turned back after a diversionary attack from the center, we could only see one of the two guys we had been shooting at. We fired when he got into a clearing, and we managed to shot him in the head. However, the far left trench was taken over and the center trench was hard pressed, so we were kinda alone. We sent Andrew and Jesse into the bush to see of they could find the second guy, and soon me and Morgan were alone. I fired a few rounds at some hiding dudes, but was unable to hit them. As I began to load a few more paintballs into my gun Morgan screamed and clutched the back of his head. The second guy was behind us, and I was next! I stared at him and prepared for a shot to the chest (seeing how that was the largest target), and just he was pulling the trigger the whistle blew. Time up, so we managed to hold them off in one trench, with me being the lone survivor.
The next round we were at the bottom of the hill, and when the whistle blew I shot up the left side as fast as I could. I dove into some cover and fired a few rounds, then my gun did the most horrid thing. It jammed. Yup, I was now defenceless and alone. I quickly ran up to the instructor guy and he fixed my gun in about 2 seconds, which made me think I was unworthy to play. However, I quickly ran back to the starting position and started the climb once more, passing some teammates who were climbing the center. I set my sites on the center trench which was pounding our boys and girls senseless. The left trench was gone, nobody left to defend it, so I got a little closer but kept to the trees. I saw heads popping up for a couple of seconds at a time, then disappearing quickly. I aimed for where I thought the next head would protrude, and my patience paid off. Two heads popped up and I unleashed a fury upon them, firing as fast as my finger could tap the trigger. Both people screamed and ran off to the area where the "wounded" went, and I thought I might have this situation turned around. I was pumped, I had saved the day! I single-handedly turned the tide of the battle, and now there was only a handful left. My cockiness nearly killed me.
I began to get up to jump into the empty left trench when I saw a gun pointed at me. I dove just in time and saw the tree that saved my life having the sap kicked out of it. I sheltered my head and waited for a ball to strike me anytime.
A sudden lull allowed me to get behind better cover, and the sniping started again. Me and the mystery shooter packed away furiously, each unable to hit the other. I then saw one of the parents crawling up the hill commando style, gun blazing at the main trench. It was one of the bravest things I have ever seen. Then I had my chance arrive.
The mystery man, obviously awestruck by the masked woman crawling up the hill regardless of a potential welt, stood up slightly to get a better view. I then rose slowly, firing three shots in quick succession. The third struck home and he went down in a heap of...um...can't think of the word but you know what I'm thinking of.
The stillness after he went down stunned me, and I didn't know whether or not everyone was shot. A pair of hands then went up form the main trench, the last person holding out surrendering. A glorious day indeed.
I later got a wonderful shot through a 2 inch opening, totally fluke but beautiful nonetheless. The shot squeezed between the crack in a window, and struck a enemy player in the back of the head. Got a good laugh out of that.
Anyway, thus ends today's story, I shall write again soon enough, but as of right now I am suffering from eyestrain and must rest them. Maybe I'll watch a movie....